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"Biker Wisdom"

Midnight bugs taste best.

Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they CAN hold everything you need.

NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench.

Never try to race an old geezer, he may have one more gear than you.

Home is where your bike sits still long enough to leave a few drops of oil on the ground.

Routine maintenance should never be neglected.

It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.

The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rearview mirror.

Never be afraid to slow down.

Bikes don't leak oil, they mark their territory.

Don't ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise.

Pie and coffee are as important as gasoline.

Sometimes it takes a whole tankful of fuel before you can think straight.

If you want to get a job, you may have to compromise your principals (you may even have to shave).

Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone.

Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.

Never mistake horsepower for staying power.

A good rider has balance, judgment, and good timing. So does a good lover.

A cold hamburger can be reheated quite nicely by strapping it to an exhaust pipe and riding forty miles.

Never do less than forty miles before breakfast.

If you don't ride in the rain - you don't ride.

A bike on the road is worth two in the shed.

Respect the person who has seen the dark side of motorcycling and lived.

Young riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go.

A good mechanic will let you watch without charging you for it.

Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.

Always back your bike into the curb - and sit where you can see it.

Work to ride & ride to work.

Whatever it is, it's better in the wind.

Two-lane blacktop isn't a highway - it's an attitude.

When you look down the road, it seems to never end - but you better believe it does.

A rider can smell a party 5,000 miles away.

Winter is Nature's way of telling you to Modify.

A motorcycle can't sing on the streets of a city.

Keep your bike in good repair: Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.

People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.

If the bike isn't braking properly, you don't start by rebuilding the engine.

Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor.

Well-trained reflexes are quicker than luck.

Good coffee should be indistinguishable from 50 weight motor oil.

The best alarm clock is sunshine on a faceshield.

Learn to do counter-intuitive things that may someday save your butt.

The twisties - not the superslabs - separate the riders from the squids.

When you're riding lead -- don't spit.

If you really want to know what's going on, watch what's happening at least five cars ahead.

Don't make a reputation you'll have to live down or run away from later.

If the person in the next lane at the stoplight rolls up the window and locks the door, support their view of life by snarling at them.

A friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2 am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you're broken down.

If she changes her oil more than she changes her mind -- follow her.

Catching a June bug or yellow jacket in your goggles or honeybee down your shirt @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary.

If you want to get somewhere before sundown, you can't stop at every tavern.

There's something ugly about a NEW bike on a trailer.

Don't lead the pack if you don't know where you're going.

Sleep with one arm through the spokes and keep your pants on.

Practice wrenching on your own bike.

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't.

Beware the rider who says the bike never breaks down.

Owning two bikes is useful because at least one can be raided for parts at any given time.

Don't argue with a 18-wheeler.

Never be ashamed to unlearn an old habit.

Maintenance is as much art as it is science.

A good long ride can clear your mind, restore your faith, and use up a lot of fuel.

If you can't get it going with bungee cords and electrician's tape - it's serious.

If you ride like there's no tomorrow - there won't be.

Bikes parked out front mean good chicken-fried steak inside.

Gray-haired riders don't get that way from pure luck.

There are drunk riders. There are old riders. There are NO old, drunk riders.

Thin leather looks good standing around, but it won't save your butt from "road rash" if you go down.

The best modifications cannot be seen from the outside.

Always replace the cheapest parts first.

You can forget what you do for a living when your knee is on the Pavement.

No matter what marquee you ride, it's all the same wind.

Patience is the ability to keep your motor idling.

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4,680 Posts
NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench.
i need that posted on my property somewhere.

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5,192 Posts
One additional thought:
Always make the guy who chews tobacco ride in the back. ;)

I don't sleep with my arm throught the spokes when I camp, but a cheep bicycle chain type lock or length of chain will loop though the wheel and back to your ankle while you sleep, and it will still let you turn over and get confortable. At hotels, I get a ground-floor room with an outside entrance, and just pull the bike right into the room.

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1,107 Posts
nice post, i like them all!!! i have to agree with trapper best post since i have been here!!!

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3,027 Posts
DrBob said:
At hotels, I get a ground-floor room with an outside entrance, and just pull the bike right into the room.
I second that. I always do the same. Why would I leave my girlfriend outside? Even my wife understands that!

In a past life (Harley rider :evil: )I would rent ground floor apartments with the understanding that my bike always came inside.
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