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Discussion Starter #1
I hope nobody here has heard it yet. I also hope you can appreciate it. If not I will take it back to my M50 buddies.

What's the difference between a harley and a hoover vaccum.......



You can fit 2 dirt bags on a harley. HEY OHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

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Yea thats a good one. Try this one...........

10-year-old girl was walking down the street when a big man on a black motorcycle pulls up beside her and says, "Hey little girl, do you want to go for a ride?"

"NO!" says the little girl as she keeps on walking.

The motorcyclist pulls up beside her again and says, "Hey kid, I will give you $10 if you hop on the back."

"NO!" said the little girl and proceeded down the street a little quicker.

The motorcyclist pulls up to the little girl again and says, "Okay kid, I will give you $20 and a BIG bag of candy if you hop on the back of my bike for a ride."

At this point the little girl turns to him and screams angrily,

"Look Dad, YOU bought a Suzuki instead of a Harley, so, YOU ride it!"
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Ralph came home really drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a
deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St.Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph.'
Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'
Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.
The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'
'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster, obviously you've never laid an egg before? Well, just relax and let it happen.
It's no big deal,' said the rooster.
Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped his first egg!
Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood.
He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head,

and heard his wife shout.....



"Dammit, Ralph! Wake up. You're chittin' the bed!"
 

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Now thats funny...........:lol4:
 

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Ahhhhh, a first graders joke.

Yes I have a Harley and an 06 M50.
does that make you bilingual, in motorcycle speak?
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Yea thats a good one. Try this one...........

10-year-old girl was walking down the street when a big man on a black motorcycle pulls up beside her and says, "Hey little girl, do you want to go for a ride?"

"NO!" says the little girl as she keeps on walking.

The motorcyclist pulls up beside her again and says, "Hey kid, I will give you $10 if you hop on the back."

"NO!" said the little girl and proceeded down the street a little quicker.

The motorcyclist pulls up to the little girl again and says, "Okay kid, I will give you $20 and a BIG bag of candy if you hop on the back of my bike for a ride."

At this point the little girl turns to him and screams angrily,

"Look Dad, YOU bought a Suzuki instead of a Harley, so, YOU ride it!"
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Man it was just a joke! Don't take it so personal. But that is a good one. Honestly I thought you were just going to try to say that I'm a pedophile or something. Anyway, I got nothing against Harley's, it's just a funny joke. My boss didn't like it very much either though.
 

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Didn't take it personel at all...You just kind of said ALL Harley riders were dirt bags. So its just a little tit for tat kind of joke. Maybe there are pedophiles that ride suzukis!!! (I mean its JUST a joke!)
 

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ok,

here is how i heard this joke;

What is the difference between a Hoover vacuum and a Harley?

Different kinds of dirt-bags.

I heard this in a tavern in Milwaukee, after I told the bartender that i had just come from the Harley Museum.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
No I don't think harley riders are dirt bags. I mean there are some, but in general I get along with every one that I have met. Doesn't take away from the comical value. Same with your joke. By the way, I am a pedophile......... j/k.
 

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A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion's cage.
Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside the cage, as her terrified, parents watch helplessly.
The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and
the biker brings her to her terrified
parents, who thank him endlessly. A New York Times reporter has watched the whole incident. The reporter says, Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I saw a man do in
my whole life. The biker replies, Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars.
I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted accordingly. The reporter says, Well, I'm a journalist from the New York Times, and
tomorrow's paper will have this story on the front page... So, what do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?
The biker replies, I'm a U.S. Marine and a Republican.

The following morning the biker buys The New York Times to see if it indeed had news of his deed and reads, on the front page:

U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH
 

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Keeping Your Chrome Shiney

This guy has always dreamed of owning a Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to the dealer.

After he picks out the perfect bike, the dealer tells him about an old biker trick that will keep the chrome on his new bike free from rust. The dealer tells him that all he has to do is to keep a jar of Vaseline handy and put it on the chrome before it rains, and everything will be fine. He happily pays for the bike and leaves.

A few months later, the young man meets a woman and falls in love. She asks him to come home and meet her parents over dinner. He readily accepts and the date is set. At the appointed time, he picks her up on his Harley and they ride to her parents house. Before they go in, she tells him that they have a family tradition that whoever speaks first after dinner must do the dishes.

After a delicious dinner everyone sits in silence waiting for the first person to break the silence and get stuck doing the dishes. After a long fifteen minutes, the young man decides to speed things up, so he reaches over and kisses his woman in front of her family. No one says a word.

Emboldened, he slips his hand under her blouse and fondles her breasts. Still no one says a word.

Finally, he throws her on the table and has sex with her in front of everyone. No one says a word.

Now he is getting desperate, so he grabs her mother and throws HER on the table. They have even wilder sex. Still no one speaks. By now he is thinking what to do next when he hears thunder in the distance. His first thought is to protect the chrome on his Harley, so he gets his jacket, reaches in his pocket and pulls out his jar of Vaseline.

The father says, "Okay dammit, I'll do the dishes!"
 

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Morning Sex
she was standing in the kitchen
preparing to boil eggs for breakfast,
wearing only the 'T' shirt that she normally slept in.

As I walked in almost awake,
she turned and said softly,
'You've got to make love to me this very moment.'

My eyes lit up and I thought,
'I am either still dreaming or
this is going to be my lucky day.'

Not wanting to lose the moment,
I embraced her and then gave it my all;
right there on the kitchen table.

Afterwards she said, 'Thanks,' and returned to the stove, her 'T' shirt still around her neck.

A little puzzled, I asked, 'What was that all about?'

She explained, 'The egg timer's broken.'
 

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A little puzzled, I asked, 'What was that all about?'

She explained, 'The egg timer's broken.'
I will have to add that to my signature.
 

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However there are Dirt Bag Pedophiles, ........ they ride Honda's.


Joking, Joking. :lol4:
That one wins the best joke of the thread contest! :lol4:
 
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