[charleym3]

My wife has put 2 conditions on my riding a bike again. The first is that I double my life insurance policy. That I can do.
The other is that I carry long term care insurance in the event that I become a quadriplegic. Long term care insurance is expensive.
What I want to know is this: What is the likelyhood that I will be perminantly disabled in a motorcycle crash. I read the Hurt Report back when I took the experienced rider course in 1991, but it didn't cover this.
The other question is, anyone know where I can get good rates on LTC insurance?

 

[Uncle Bob]

Don't know the exact figure but do know that it's 26 times greater than in a car.

 

[md2lgyk]

Sounds as though your wife has a big problem with you wanting to ride a bike at all. Perhaps you should try to work that out instead of looking for expensive insurance. After all, what do you think she'll demand after the first time you drop the bike? And you will, if you ride long enough.

Is this her only problem, or do you need her permission, and have to meet unreasonable demands, to do anything you want to do? If so, you're headed for a long and unhappy life - trust me. been there done that with wife #1.

Fortunately, my current wife has no problem with me riding, or with my other hobby (handguns), or when I decided late in life to become a police officer. Of course, I made sure she understood they were just things I did before we got serious.

 

[Clint]

Don't know the exact figure but do know that it's 26 times greater than in a car.

Given the W I D E range of risk factors, that statistic oversimplifies the scenario. I don't ever drink while riding, I don't ride interstates in the city, I wear proper gear, I keep my bike in good shape, and I have training.

I'd say it's more like 3 times for me. Now, if you're a squid... :wink:

I think md**** has the right idea. Work out the issues with your lady.

 

[charleym3]

She fears for her security. The really interesting thing is that she has never once asked me what safety gear I'm going to wear to protect myself, what kind of helmet, what training I'm going to get... She fast forwards to "when you have been badly injured in a wreck and can no longer work and need at home care..." I can't promise her that nothing bad will ever happen to me. All I can do is learn, practice, and wear the best gear I can find.
We've been married 21 years now. We've weathered some hard times. Things are better now. No she does not have veto power over this decision which really makes her mad. When I stopped riding before I said more than I should have and it's coming back on me.

The other issue that drove a big wedge between us was when I got a concealed carry permit. 6 years later she is still convinced that I'm going to make a mistake and end up in jail and ruin her life.
She really wants me to just go through life on her terms.

 

[md2lgyk]

Your last sentence says it all, my friend.

I think it's interesting you mention the CCW permit. Are you allowed to have guns in the house? Do you actually carry? I frequent several gun-related forums and can't count the number of times this issue comes up. My wife was once also a competitive shooter like me and is comfortable with handling guns and having them around. She doesn't mind that I carry, but doesn't see the need for it either. She often works late by herself at our small-town library, but all I can convince her to carry is OC (pepper spray). I don't understand the mindset of such people (her included).

 

[charleym3]

She grew up around guns and shoots once in a while. She thinks that only the police should be allowed to carry. She remains convinced that I'm a vigilante looking for a problem and when I find it I'll either get killed on the spot because I'm incompetent or shoot a bystander because I'm reckless. Never mind that I repeated the training every year, practice every month, and scored in the top 20% on Police comp and qual course.
No I don't carry anymore though I keep up the license and practice. I agreed to leave it in the safe for her peace of mind. I'm afraid that set an unfortunate presedence though.

 

[Uncle Bob]

Need answers ? Yes you do but maybe not from a M/C forum maybe a mariage counselor ?.

 

[md2lgyk]

Yes, I second that suggestion. Your wife seems to have some serious issues. Motorcycles and handguns are only the symptoms.

 

[SuzukiGirl1]

If you have made it 21 years w/o getting divorced...you must be doing something right!! :shock: I wouldn't listen to people telling you to get divorced because of the bike. I'm sure she is just worried about the future and is feeling uneasy because she isn't familiar w/ bikes and has all of her friends telling her that she better watch out becuase they know 50 people that have died on their bikes and left their wives and children high and dry.

I would sit her down, tell her that you understand why she feels the way she does and ask her to try and understand why you want to ride and how it makes you feel. Get her a helmet and a jacket and take her for short, SLOW rides around and she'll start to come around! :wink:

 

[Louis]

I agree with SuzukiGirl1. Seems there a lot you need to discuss though.

Good luck

 

[charleym3]

No a divorce isn't going to happen over this. She can't ride right now either. She has a bad back and I don't have the skills yet.
Thanks for the input. I don't really think that there is a solution for this. Best I can hope for is a cease fire.

 

[zleviticus]

Listen I am right there with you... We have been married for only 7 years now with a 2 year old and I want a bike and am getting a bke. It was an ordeal though to convince her. She realizes that i am doing what I can to minimize the risks. Classes, gear, books, training..etc... she has talked to others that ride and they tell her I am doing everythig the way i should. What we did do though is up my life insurance in case something happens. You just have to sit downa nd talk it out.. listen to what her real reasons are and tell her yours and make sure she listens to your views... We own some older cars (67 camaro and 67 mustang) and gettign caught in a collission with those on the interstate or major road would be distaterous (lap belts only) that metal does nto give. You can get killed walking down the street. you ahve to try to learn to minimize the risks and be smart about it... There are people who ride a year and get killed and those who ride for 40 and never get a major injury... Its all part of living life. I think if we all knew what was going to be around that next corner life would not be that fun to live. Living life without some risk is not really living life...

From merriam webster:

Living : to have a life rich in experience

 

[TL chris]

Listen I am right there with you... We have been married for only 7 years now with a 2 year old and I want a bike and am getting a bke. It was an ordeal though to convince her. She realizes that i am doing what I can to minimize the risks. Classes, gear, books, training..etc... she has talked to others that ride and they tell her I am doing everythig the way i should. What we did do though is up my life insurance in case something happens. You just have to sit downa nd talk it out.. listen to what her real reasons are and tell her yours and make sure she listens to your views... We own some older cars (67 camaro and 67 mustang) and gettign caught in a collission with those on the interstate or major road would be distaterous (lap belts only) that metal does nto give. You can get killed walking down the street. you ahve to try to learn to minimize the risks and be smart about it... There are people who ride a year and get killed and those who ride for 40 and never get a major injury... Its all part of living life. I think if we all knew what was going to be around that next corner life would not be that fun to live. Living life without some risk is not really living life...

From merriam webster:

Living : to have a life rich in experience

I'm in a similar situation with my wife. I've been married for 2 years and have a 16 month old son. I've already had 4 bikes, 2 dirt and 2 sportbikes. Didn't have a wreck on the sportbikes (knock on wood), but plenty on the dirt. What's also not helping my cause is that my wifes brother, 1 year older than me, wrecked his 89 Katana on an unfamiliar road. I told her I wanted a bike 1 week before he wrecked it. So , of course, as soon as she heard what happened to him she tells me I'm not getting a bike. So I'm about in the same boat as yous guys. I convinced her but she still thinks bikes are deathtraps.

 

[87gsxrnut]

What's more important? Wife or buying/riding a bike? If you said a bike, then maybe you should rethink why you got married in the first place.

Also, is it the BIKE, or the MONEY spent on purchasing the bike, or the TIME you will be away from your wife galavanting with your friends instead of doing things around the house that your better half is concerned about?

I had bikes before I was married, while I was married, after I got married and when my wife passed away. They were always there, but it was clear that I was not giving them up just because I was getting married. I turned it into something we could do together, and we had a lot of fun sport-touring around.

As for getting in a wreck? Roll the dice. That is what it amounts to. Being alert, knowing your machine, knowing your terrain and roads, and riding while your head is clear is the best defense against going down. Even then, you just never know.

- Nut

 

[007]

I actually don't see biking as the most dangerous activity out there...rock climbing, sky diving, skiing and ocean sailing can quickly turn on you, and things get ugly very, very fast. I happen to do skiing and sailing, and had a brush with death a couple of times. The only thing that saves your ass is your own training and education. And the only thing that calms down your family is to show them how much time you actually train and prepare for these activities. Of course, the safest thing is to sit in front of the TV and munch on potato chips...the safest way to waste your life that is... :lol: